How to drink beer in 4 easy steps!

With St. Patrick's Day just a couple weeks away I thought it was high time I show the masses (all three of you that follow my blog) the proper way to consume nitrogenated Irish stout. Do yourself (and your liver) a favor by skipping the plastic yards of dyed green Miller Genuine Trash for something a little more true to the spirit of the day. Splurge a little and buy yourself a quality Irish draft. While out on the town I can almost guarantee the only Irish stout you will see is Guinness. They would have you believe that the only proper way to drink their stout is to pour it, let it settle, top it off, let it settle again, and then enjoy. I don't care what they say, nitrogenated beer should be consumed as soon as it is poured. With Guinness, it gives actual clarity to the flavors of the beer. Letting it settle and then topping off is ridiculous and ruins what could have been beautiful. It might be a little difficult to receive your beer in this superior state while at a bar since Guinness has every bartender this side of the Atlantic "trained" in the horrible method of ruining beer. I have requested my beer "while it's leveling" on several occasions and had to explain that I simply meant, "Fill my glass all the way to the top, do not let it settle, and hand it to me A.S.A.P!" While you might get a superior leveling stout before it's too late, you also risk the chance of making an enemy of the bartender, but it’s nothing a good tip can't fix. All hope is not lost though. Not to sound like a jerk by telling you something you already know, but beer is cheaper by the case and you can pour it properly yourself.

Step 1: Get your can and glass ready.

It is wrong on so many levels to pour Murphy's into a Guinness glass.

Step 2: Crack open that can and start pouring.

 You shouldn't pour straight like this; it is better to hold the glass at a 45° angle.

Letting something this beautiful just sit and wait to be drank would be a sin so...

Step 3: Drink your beer!

Step 4: Look at what is left in your glass: Guinness would rather you drink an entire glass of this. Once you finish what is left, you will realize they are wrong and that it was far superior while leveling.

Since this blog is also about TV, I'll just cover my bases by saying almost everything on Thursday was a repeat. But feel free to go to http://www.guinness.com/, click on "The Beer," and then select the glass of Guinness. There will be a side bar that says "How to Pour the Perfect Guinness." Watch that video and note at 27 seconds when he says "stop," that is when the glass should be filled the rest of the way and then instantly consumed.